1. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
2. I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.
She looked surprised.
3. What’s a skeleton’s least favorite room in the house?
The living room!
4. I only know 25 letters of the alphabet.
I don’t know y.
5. Why don’t oysters donate to charity?
Because they are shellfish!
6. I used to play piano by ear, but now I use my hands and fingers.
Why did the scarecrow win an award?
7. Because he was outstanding in his field!
I asked the librarian if the library had any books on paranoia.
8. She whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
Parallel lines have so much in common.
9. It’s a shame they’ll never meet.
10. I told my computer I needed a break,
and now it won’t stop sending me vacation ads.