1. Why did the politician refuse to get a job?
Because he didn’t want to lose his constituency.
2. What’s the difference between a politician and a vampire?
One sucks the life out of you, and the other is a fictional creature.
3. Why did the politician refuse to take a DNA test?
Because he didn’t want to be held accountable for his genes.
4. How does a politician cook an omelet?
With a lot of flip-flopping.
5. Why did the politician go to the doctor?
To get his poll numbers checked.
6. Why don’t politicians trust atoms?
Because they make up everything.
7. What’s the difference between a politician and a flea?
One is a bloodsucking parasite, and the other is a flea.
8. Why don’t politicians go to the gym?
Because they prefer to exercise their right to remain silent.
9. Why don’t politicians play hide-and-seek?
Because nobody would ever find them.
10. Why did the politician put his hands in his pockets?
Because he wanted to keep his promises safe.