Here are jokes that should be suitable for both The Guardian and children

1. What do you call a snowman with a six-pack?
   An abdominal snowman!

2. Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself?
    Because it was two-tired.

3. Why did the tomato turn red?
    Because it saw the salad dressing!

4. Why did the banana go to the doctor?
    Because it wasn’t peeling well.

5. Why do birds fly south in the winter?
    Because it’s too far to walk!

6. What do you call a fake noodle?
    An impasta!

7. What do you call a can opener that doesn’t work?
    A can’t opener!

8. Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
    Because it felt crumbly.

9. What’s the best way to watch a fly fishing tournament?
    Live stream!

10. What do you call a belt made of watches?
     A waist of time!