When Doctor and Patient Relationships Get Awkwardly Funny Best Jokes

1. Patient: “Doctor, I think I’m turning into a frog!”
   Doctor: “Don’t worry, I’m sure it’s just a hoppy phase.”

2. Doctor: “I’m sorry to say, but you have a rare disease that only gives you ten minutes to live.”
    Patient: “Oh my god, what can you do to help me?”
    Doctor: “I’m sorry, but I’m afraid I can’t help you right now, I’m already halfway through my next appointment.”

3. Patient: “Doctor, I keep hearing the same song over and over again.”
    Doctor: “What song is it?”
    Patient: “It’s the Hokey Pokey.”
    Doctor: “Well, it sounds like you’ve got yourself a case of the Hokey Pokey blues.”

4. Doctor: “I’m afraid I have some bad news. You have a rare disease that causes you to think you’re a chicken.”
    Patient: “Oh no, that’s terrible! How long will I have to live like this?”
   Doctor: “Fortunately, we have a cure for that. All you have to do is take these pills, and you’ll be cured in no         time.”
   Patient: “That’s great! But, um…what about the eggs?”

5. Patient: “Doctor, I feel like a pack of cards!”
    Doctor: “Well, that’s easy to fix. Just sit down, and I’ll deal with you.”

6. Doctor: “You need to stop masturbating so much.”
    Patient: “Why, is it bad for my health?”
   Doctor: “No, it’s just really distracting during our appointments.”

7. Patient: “Doctor, I have a pain in my eye every time I drink tea.”
    Doctor: “Have you tried taking the spoon out of the cup first?”

8. Doctor: “I’m afraid your test results came back positive for being too handsome.”
    Patient: “What? Is that even a thing?”
    Doctor: “No, I just wanted to give you a compliment.”

9. Patient: “Doctor, every time I sneeze, I feel like a car is driving through my head.”
    Doctor: “Well, that sounds like a case of the road rage sneezes.”

10. Doctor: “I’m sorry to say, but your condition is terminal.”
     Patient: “Oh no, how long do I have?”
    Doctor: “Well, technically speaking, the moment you were born, you started dying, so we’re all terminal in a        way.”