Politicians Say the Darndest Things: 5 Funny Political Jokes

1. Why don’t politicians ever get lost?
   Because no matter where they go, they always end up in the middle of a scandal.

2. Why did the politician bring a ladder to the bar?
    Because he heard the drinks were on the house.

3. What’s a politician’s favorite exercise?
    Jumping to conclusions.

4. Why did the politician stay up all night?
    To read the Constitution. He heard it’s full of loopholes.

5. How do you keep a politician from cheating on their diet?
    Lock up all the pork barrels.

6. Why did the politician go to the doctor?
    He had a bad case of election fever.

7. What’s a politician’s favorite type of music?
    Campaign-paign songs.

8. Why did the politician cross the road?
    To get to the other bribe.

9. What’s the difference between a politician and a flying pig?
    The letter “F.”

10. How can you tell if a politician is lying?
     Their lips are moving.