Top 10 The Ultimate Collection of Doctor & Patient Jokes

1. Why did the doctor carry a red pen?
   In case they needed to draw blood.

2. Why did the patient put his money in the medicine cabinet?
     He wanted to be a little savings and loan.

3. Why did the doctor carry a flashlight?
    So they could examine patients in the dark.

4. What did the patient say to the doctor after a long wait?
    “I feel like I’ve been waiting for an eternity!”

5. Why did the doctor go to the bank?
    To check their patient’s blood pressure.

6. What did the patient say to the doctor after a successful operation?
    “Doc, I think you just gave me a new lease on life.”

7. Why did the doctor take their coffee to the exam room?
    They wanted to keep the patient awake.

8. What did the patient say to the doctor after getting a shot?
    “Thanks for the painless injection.”

9. Why did the doctor bring a ladder to the examination room?
    To see over the patient’s high blood pressure.

10. What did the patient say to the doctor after a check-up?
     “Well doc, I’m feeling a lot better than when I walked in.”