1. Why don’t scientists trust atoms?
Because they make up everything!
2. I bought a ceiling fan the other day. Complete waste of money.He just stands there applauding and saying, “Ooh, I love how smooth it is.”
3. Why did the scarecrow win an award?
Because he was outstanding in his field!
4. I asked the gym instructor if he could teach me to do the splits. He replied, “How flexible are you?” I said, “I can’t make it on Mondays.”
5. Why did the tomato turn red?
Because it saw the salad dressing!
6. What do you call fake spaghetti?
7. I tried to catch some fog yesterday,
but I mist.
8. What do you call a bear with no teeth?
A gummy bear!
9. Why don’t skeletons fight each other?
They don’t have the guts!
10. How does a penguin build its house?
Igloos it together!